Sleep

It’s not late,
it’s not early.
I want to stay up.
Awake.
but my body is fighting that mightily. My body gave up on me ages ago and so tonight is no surprise. There’s never enough sleep to rest a body racked with chronic pain. My mind though, my mind….I wish I could just stay awake. I want more hours to myself after the kids have gone to bed. I want to read or paint or roll around in bed with my sexy husband….but my eyes are so heavy and my body so sore. I’m angry. I have ideas I need to get out but I can’t fight it much longer. I turn on some music, my last ditch attempt to feel or do something meaningful before sleep takes me.

Sleep, my closest most loved friend and much hated enemy. A caretaker that plays the bad guy and calls me in before I’m ready.

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